Dealing with a cheating husband could be one of the worst things in life. But, of course, every marriage has its share of challenges. But some marital problems could threaten the longevity of your marriage. One of them is cheating. Have you discovered that your husband is cheating on you and wondering how to cope? This article is for you.
Read to the end if you want to know the questions to ask a cheating husband that may motivate him to rethink his ways and make amends with you. What to do if you discover you have a cheating husband and how to cope if your husband seems to have sworn never to stop cheating on you.
What to Say to a Cheating Husband
No woman wishes to marry a man that will cheat on them as the marriage progresses. But life happens, and now you have a cheating husband before you to deal with, even though you hate the fact. You have to face it.
Most times, some words could make him rethink and apologies for his actions. In other instances, it may not affect him. But who says you can’t try?
- Ask him why he is cheating on you
This question may hit him hard. But it could also help you understand his true intentions towards you. Ask him what led him to consider another woman. Perhaps, he thinks you no longer care for him enough, or you have stopped loving him.
Either way, brace yourself for a response that may surprise you.
- How many times have you cheated on me?
Ask him if the act of infidelity was once or multiple times. This may help you understand how far he has strayed away from his marital vows. It could also help you realize the amount of work the both of you must put into your marriage to make it work again.
- How many women have you cheated with?
A unique way to know how to deal with a cheating husband is not just knowing how many times he cheated but with how many women. Was it just with one woman or a different woman?
- What do you want?
Since you now know he is cheating on you, it would help if you ask him what he wants from the relationship going forward. Try to understand his plans for the association. Does he want to continue or call it to quit with you?
Knowing his plans for you both could save you some time. If he has already resolved to leave you for someone else, it will help you make informed decisions than waste your precious time trying to resurrect a dead relationship.
- How do you feel about cheating on me?
This is one of the questions you could ask a cheating husband that may hit him hard in his heart. Since you know about his cheating acts, how does that make him feel? Does he feel threatened, relaxed, or panicking?
His reaction could help you know how to handle a cheating husband.
8 Tips for Handling a Cheating Husband
We know infidelity is a serious issue in a relationship, and asking a cheating husband some questions isn’t enough to deal with the situation. Although, the answers might help you know if he is willing to change his ways or not.
Nevertheless, here are some tips for dealing with a cheating husband even though he is unrepentant.
Get Tested
Even though it may sound embarrassing, it’s the truth. A cheating husband probably threw caution to the wind when they engaged in illicit sexual affairs outside their marriages. The majority of STDs do not have symptoms. Therefore, it’s necessary to go for a test with your husband. Your husband’s cheating mate could have some diseases, and you don’t want to become a victim of circumstance, do you?
Decide if You Want to Fix Your Marriage
Usually, a cheating husband may never turn a green leaf and repair the damages of their infidelity. So, the onus is on you to decide whether you want to rebuild the relationship by yourself or make him realize he has wronged you and take on the responsibility of rebuilding the relationship.
You must consider this crucial decision carefully, no matter how pressured you feel.
Don’t Tell Everyone Your Husband Cheats
Try to resist the temptation of announcing to the public, family members, or whoever cares to listen that your husband is cheating on you. This will never help the situation. Rather, it may worsen it. In addition, you could have thousands of unsolicited advice from your listeners that may be confusing. And these suggestions could lure you into jumping to conclusions or making the wrong decision regarding your relationship.
It doesn’t matter whether you eventually seek a divorce. But your marital woes should never be the business of the public or family members.
Don’t Blame Yourself
Has your husband told you that you caused it all? Did he say you made him cheat on you? Relax; it’s not the end of the world. But, even if he does, don’t attribute any blame to yourself. It’s easier to forgive a cheating husband than forgive yourself.
Depressing thoughts could easily surface when you blame yourself for the failures in your marriage. But, remember, you aren’t the one that cheated. He did!
Avoid Taking Revenge
The deed is done, and resorting to revenge by cheating on your husband is not the best thing to do. The saying goes, “two wrongs cannot make a right.” You may want to cheat back, so he feels the pain too, but don’t do it because all it provides is temporary relief from the emotional pain you feel.
It doesn’t make sense to be found guilty of an act you accuse another of. All you need is a permanent solution that could help you deal with your cheating husband.
Confront Your Cheating Husband
At this stage, if you still want to know more about how to handle a cheating husband, you may have to confront him. This could be a very dicey situation and nerve-racking too. However, it may help if you knew his possible reaction.
Try to suppress your feeling and avoid violence or abusive words. Instead, talk to him with passion and pain. Tell him you never bargained for such and do not deserve to be cheated on. However, confronting him may not be ideal if you think he may resort to violence a bit to cover up his acts.
Seek Relationship Counseling
A relationship coach or counselor is an expert and could help resolve the crises in your marriage by showing you how to deal with a cheating husband. Since they are experts in love and marriage, you may consider booking an appointment with anyone.
However, you must go with your cheating husband because the advice you will get could help you both rebuild your broken home from scratch.
It’s also vital that you trust their counseling and heed their advice. It doesn’t matter whether your husband does the same or not.
Decide Whether to Forgive or Divorce
Forgiveness is a choice that you should make from the heart. Forgiveness isn’t an instance. It takes time to overcome the pain that a cheating husband brings to a peaceful marriage. However, once you have overcome the pain and anger, you may begin to see things from another perspective. And that is when forgiveness creeps in.
It may take weeks, months, or even years for most women to let go of the anger triggered by infidelity. And when you decide to forgive, ensure it’s from your heart and without any hidden agenda.
On the contrary, forgiveness is never compulsory. The pain of infidelity could hurt so much that you choose to divorce your cheating husband. That’s never a crime. It’s only a choice!
Remember never to keep your partner in the dark whatever choice you make. Instead, let them know if they have been forgiven or if they should prepare to sign some divorce papers in the future.
Irrespective of your decision, it’s essential to do what makes you happy during these trying times. Remember, your heart has been shattered and torn to pieces by his cheating acts. So don’t let anxiety, anger, or regret cloud your thoughts all day.
You deserve to be happy, so make yourself a happy woman!
Is it Worth Staying with a Cheating Husband?
As funny as it may seem, only you can provide an answer to this question. This is because every marriage is different, and so are the circumstances surrounding each act of infidelity. In addition, you understand your emotions better than anyone.
If you think you can cope with a cheating husband, it is!
Final Thought
Figuring out what to say to a cheating husband and what to do if your husband is cheating on you could be very challenging. This guide will guide you as you figure out where you stand in the marriage. Hopefully, you can make an informed decision that won’t lead to another emotional breakdown.
