When it comes to relationships and dating, there are things you should avoid on your first date. The truth is, dating can be tough, especially when it has to do with the first date. It is harder than it sounds. Not many people end up having a splendid first-date experience. Although it’s important to leave a good impression, it’s not too difficult. You have plenty of time to prepare yourself for that day.
Every first date you have is potentially the last first date you will ever have. It only takes one time to meet the perfect person and once you find them, the search comes to an end and you’ll no longer have a reason to go on a first date.
You need to make the best impression every time you are on your first date. After all, a first date is certainly not an assurance that you will get a second, so you need to make that assurance while you’re at it.
The truth is dating is much like a game in a way. We all want to win the ultimate prize. For the ladies, that’ll be Prince Charming. Unfortunately, the dating game doesn’t always end the way we’d like it to. Sometimes it’s because there’s simply no spark, or there’s no attraction. Other times, we do things to sabotage the relationship right from the very beginning.
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10 Things You Should Avoid On Your First Date
1. Don’t Be Late
One of the things you should avoid on your first date is showing up late. Imagine yourself waiting out in the rain or cold for your date, you won’t like that. So make sure you plan your schedule excellently well, such that you are at the agreed date spot before she gets there.
As a gentleman, it is not right to keep a lady waiting, and while several factors could contribute to lateness (bad weather or traffic), if you decide not to be late, you will arrive early.
2. Don’t Talk About Your Ex
Talking about your ex on your first date can be a big turnoff for a lot of people. Oftentimes, it’s a sign that you’re not completely over your ex and your current date is merely a rebound. Talking about an ex-love forces your date to wonder if you’re ready for someone new. If you catch yourself beginning sentences with ‘I used to date someone who…’ or ‘My ex and I…,’ you are setting yourself up for failure.
3. Don’t Pay Too Much Attention To Your Phone
Social media can be intoxicating at times, between texting, tweeting, posting, and liking, it can be hard to remember life outside the screen. Texting at the table on your first date may make your date think you are not taking this seriously or are simply not interested. So put the phone aside, and take this time to focus on your date and get to know them while you can.
4. Never Split The Bill
This one is for men only and it’s seriously a big no. No women want to go on a date with a stingy man. If he doesn’t even want to pay for their first date, how can he be responsible for the future of his wife and their relationship? Just be a gentleman, pay whatever she chooses and never complain about the bill. It may cost a bit, but it’s very crucial.
5. Don’t Sleep With Him On The First Date
If you want a committed relationship and for your date to take you seriously, don’t have sex with him right away. Having sex on the first date will cloud your judgment, and if he doesn’t call again, you’re going to spend a lot of energy analyzing, stalking, and even asking him out yourself for a second and third date. Just because he had sex with you doesn’t mean he’s interested and if you care about his interest, wait to sleep with him.
6. Avoid Giving Unsolicited Advice
While you’re in the middle of a conversation during the first date, don’t give unsolicited advice. Unsolicited advice is unwanted commentary and suggestions on what you think she should do even when she hasn’t asked you for such comments.
If she talks about her work challenges and how she is trying to balance her time, don’t rush in and give time management advice. She might just have mentioned it to spice up the conversation, or maybe she wants to get it off her chest. Except she asks for your opinion only then should you give it.
7. Don’t Get Too Drunk
This is especially for the ladies who think going on a date is the perfect opportunity for them to eat and drink as much as they want to. Most people indulge in a little alcohol on a first date but try not to let yourself get too drunk. Alcohol can loosen your tongue and make you say things you didn’t plan to share. It can also lower your inhibitions, which might lead you to take things further than you’d planned on the first date. There’s plenty of time to get to know the other person better. And remember, never leave your drink unattended on a date with a stranger.
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8. Avoid Mentioning Marriage And Children
The reason we go on first dates is to find the perfect match. If you successfully meet the right person for you, then there will be plenty of opportunities to discuss marriage and children in the future. You don’t have to bring them up on a first date. It will only make the date seem like an awkward interview. Even if the other person has the same aims as you, bringing them up within minutes of meeting each other is only likely to scare him or her away. Be patient and enjoy the date for what it is, a chance to get to know someone new.
9. Avoid Talking Too Much About Yourself Or Work
The first date is the moment where both of you can talk and get to know each other. If you only talk about yourself, without giving her the chance to share her stories, it is not a date then. Make sure to create a balance between speaking about yourself and asking questions about the other person. Too much about yourself suggests you are too self-involved. Asking too much about the other person seems like an interrogation and also makes them feel uncomfortable.
The same goes if you are a working professional, you shouldn’t keep talking about your work to an extent that your date has to excuse himself/herself for a washroom break.
10. Do Not Flirt With Other Women
While you are on your first date, flirting with other women should be ruled off and if possible should not be considered. It is rude when you flirt with other women in front of your date. By flirting I mean don’t even stare at other women. However, if you think you aren’t interested in your date, at least you need to respect her until the date is over.
Conclusion
First dates are the time for magic and chemistry to begin, they are the openings to beautiful relationships and experiences that will change your life, but only if you can avoid all the easy pitfalls.
Being yourself won’t always secure you a second date, but the second date that you do get will be because the person liked who they saw, not just the act that you let them see.
Sometimes, the mistakes that occur on first dates are attributed to a lack of preparation. People who go on first dates prepared and informed will always do well. You must show up confidently.
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